Honest Conversations and Changing Views
Hello, I’ve been gone for a while now. Life has been busy with college, school, grades, and SATs. However, this is not what this blog post is about. This blog isn't another political opinion piece though expressing my own opinions. It is just a question about speech in America and the culture surrounding how we speak about politics with those of differing views from our own. In psychology, we learned of collectivist cultures vs. individualist which essentially is a type of society where people are motivated by their goal to improve the culture as a whole vs. one where people are driven by their goal to make themselves better. How we speak as Americans are very individualist and shallow, we put ourselves as looking better then we are to show others how well off we are. Just think for a second how you talk to someone you aren't close with or who isn't family. The conversation will go something like this: Hey ________ how have you been? To which you'll reply something like, Fine the family is great my job has been good and you? To which that person will reply something similar. Our primary goal is to look our best to the other person. It doesn't matter if you just lost your job or someone in your family is sick, the narrative will change a little, but the outlook will stay the same for example “I left my job but I'm looking right now, and things seem to be going very well.” This kind of conversation which is very common is shallow and one dimensional. We choose to not speak honestly in hopes that nobody will know our true nature and lives. These kinds of conversations expand to other things too. We strictly do not talk politics, It's a common occurrence in American culture, in fact, I heard it yesterday from my dad “Abbie you know that Simon is fairly old do not talk too much about your political views.” This, of course, is a very common conversation for me because I choose to know more about people and I am not silent about my views. This conversation also happened when I asked my AP Biology teacher whether he gets paid more than regular teachers to which my very good friend nudged my elbow and said: " Abbie, you can't just ask someone that." To which I just replied, “What, I’m just curious.” You do not ask someone how much they get paid and what their views are. I feel a lot of our partisanship arises from our inability to have a rational conversation with people about politics who have a different view. My uber driver one time was a very interesting man, here's his description that I got by talking to him about policy and what I plan to do. He is a gay man in a biracial relationship with a DACA recipient. What do you think? Democrat? No, he is a very conservative man pro guns, pro low taxes, pro strict immigration, and pro-Trump. Though we have vastly differing opinions, we talked equally. He shared with me his views, and I shared mine. We had a very insightful conversation, and this is not the first time this has happened. A few weeks ago I had a similar conversation with an unaligned army veteran. He felt disheartened by the treatment of veterans in the U.S. and was very strictly for border control because this is what he fought for as a military man. It had opened my eyes to why veterans usually vote Republican and I, in return, inspired him to vote in the midterm elections because though we were probably from different political spheres I told him it was his duty and what he fought for. These kinds of conversations are important in understanding each other and uniting America. I understand in some circumstances this seems to be the wrong solution like talking to a neo-nazi or a person a part of the Westboro Baptist Church, but I heard a Ted Talk by Megan Phelps-Roper, she was born into Westboro Baptist but an insightful conversation with a Jewish immigrant for many years (now her husband) changed her mind. This is a real example of what a discussion with different groups of people can do. Misunderstanding leads to these kinds of extremist groups, and education and conversation can fix that. I hope that in the years to come we can have more of these conversations to reconstruct America and build a stronger connection and a better America. I will link the youtube video mentioned because it is truly an amazing story.